This is Norris, the sketcher and writer of the web comic. No one likes him so he drowns himself in tomato juice and self-pity until it hurts until inspiration kicks in which forces out the creative bursts of creativity for the comics.

This is Lucas. Sometimes people mistake Norris and him as the same person but they are WRONG because they are most definitely very different from each other. Lucas is undeniably sane, and if someone else has another opinion, they are crazy.

This is Depressive Maniac. He tried for the role of Joshua Leonard in the Blair Witch Project but failed. He has no part in this comic at all, except for when you seen teen angst poetry and sometimes he contributes to the HTML programming and java and guitar music because Lucas and Norris don't know . . . stuff about that stuff. He betrayed Norris in 2006, causing Norris's preordained doom.